Reasons,

• All the things you got as a kid were cool for like a couple weeks at best, and then you kind of forgot about them. As a semi-adultish person, you get useful legit things that you continue to enjoy all year (new phone, great boots, ukelele, pretty dress, books). The exception being of course timeless gifts that you hold on to for a ridiculous amount of time (Chronicles of Narnia, special stuffed things)
• As a kid, if you believe in Santa past a certain age, you get made fun of. As a semi-adultish person, people just think you’re kidding if you say you still believe in Santa.
• You have complete control over the design aspects of your gingerbread.
• You get to stay up late and drink grownup eggnog.
• You have some semblance of ability to buy gifts for other people, and transportation so that they’re actually surprised.

Hank started to play guitar, but then he stopped because it was clearly painfully out of tune. This kid was like, “Your G-string is flat.” And Hank went, “Hey, kid who said that, get onstage!” So he hopped up, and I’m like, That kid is in the school of music at ASU, he’s in my piano class, and then I think, I could be fixing Hank’s guitar right now just as well as him, and I even knew what was wrong, but I didn’t say anything and now I’m listening/watching someone else do it. But I quickly moved to, Hey, I know that kid on stage, cool! And got on with my life. So this is the story of how I almost got to tune Hank’s guitar, but instead watched a bassoonist do it. The End.